In-Memory-Thoughts

 


 

Just at the moment someone says "She is gone"
Others take up the glad shout
"Here She comes!"  (See full poem below.)


I love this quote from Henry Van Dyke, and have used it many times.  The loss of a close friend or loved one is probably one of the most difficult times in life.  The Bible does not say we should not grieve….  I can only speak to Christianity, where it says that if one dies, we don’t grieve as those who have no hope.  We do have hope, knowing two things – that these friends are in heaven right now, and we will see them again.

Our In Memory page celebrates the lives of classmates who were an integral part of our journey into adulthood.  A time when we were happy to be a child with few responsibilities.  No worries of shelter, food, clothes or medical care.  No bills to pay.  A time when we were trying to figure out who we were and where we were going in life. 

And later, there were times when there were always the pressures – do I fit in, do people like me, am I wearing the right clothes?  And of course, pressure to make good grades and to decide who and what we wanted to be as a grown-up – what college should I attend.  And yet, we wanted to be an adult – doing what we wanted, in control of our lives, making our own decisions. 

These people, our classmates, traveled that road with us.  Too many in our class are gone.  We share some great memories of who they were.  Sometimes those memories fade, but we do know that these classmates died way too soon.  We feel sad.  We feel scared that we might be next.  And we feel helpless.  Sometimes in loss we turn to God - or away from God.

People often wonder what it is like to die…  A wise mother explained it like this…Her son developed a fatal disease.  The disease progressed rapidly.  At first he was unable to go to school.  Then unable to go outside to play and finally confined to his bed.  One day the question his mother dreaded most came.  “Mommy, what’s it like to die?”

Though she had prepared herself for that moment, she couldn’t handle it when it came.  She left the room, and there in the bathroom she prayed for strength and wisdom.  When she came back into the room she said, “Honey, remember when you were little and you would fall asleep in the car?  The next morning when you woke up you would be in your own bed.  Do you know how you got there?  Your father came and lifted you up and gently carried you to your own room.  That is what it’s like to die."

And so, our friends, these classmates, were gently lifted to be with a loving God.  And, I believe we will see them again one day.  And so today, let’s remember them, think about how they influenced us on our journey.  Celebrate the gifts they shared with us.  Give thanks for their lives and being a part of ours.

Rev. Karen Hardy from Buffalo, NY
West Kenmore High School Class of 1965

 


 

I am standing upon the seashore.
A ship at my side spreads her white
sails to the morning breeze and starts
for the blue ocean.

She is an object of beauty and strength.
I stand and watch her until at length
she hangs like a speck of white cloud
just where the sea and sky come 
to mingle with each other.

Then, someone at my side says;
"There, she is gone!"

"Gone where?"
Gone from my sight. That is all.
She is just as large in mast and hull
and spar as she was when she left my side
and she is just as able to bear her
load of living freight to her destined port.
Her diminished size is in me, not in her.

And just at the moment when someone
at my side says, "There, she is gone!"
There are other eyes watching her coming,
and other voices ready to take up the glad shout;
"Here she comes!"
And that is dying.

Henry Van Dyke (American short-story Writer, Poet and Essayist, 1852-1933)

 



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